I never just re-post things that I find on other blogs. However, the advice below from Liz who was a Wedding Graduate on A Practical Wedding blog had the most amazing advice. The Wedding Graduate brides usually have some great advice but what Liz said really resonated with me. Here are a few of the things Liz brought up.
A. It’s not about you. We always hear this with regard to including the groom in the planning. Don’t limit yourself here. Make the day about your relationship, your families, your friends, anyone who has been there along the whole process that ended in your marriage (and will keep on being there through the ish that’s gonna come after).
B. Damn the man. NOT choosing something because everyone else does, is just as bad as choosing something because everyone else does. It’s the same thing. (This includes nixing something because your photos will look “dated.” Um. Go back to your parents’ wedding photos. My favorites are the dated ones.)
C. It’s NOT “just one day.” The whole wedding planning process can be a butt load of fun, too. The key to this is to just suck it up and use your friends if they offer. It may make you feel super guilty handing over those envelopes to stuff and the hankies to fold, but damn, is it nice to have a second to breathe. Working with friends and family was the best part of our wedding. I may be exaggerating (having a husband is pretty awesome, too). But making all of the little details together brought about some of the best, most memorable moments of the wedding process. I couldn’t afford a veil, so my mom and I learned how to make one and shopped for the fabric together. We catered the reception ourselves, so I had hours of prep and set-up the day before with both families and tons of caring, awesome volunteers. Sure, we were exhausted by the end of the night. But I never knew you could laugh so much while setting up folding chairs and coffee pots. Not to mention, it makes everyone feel so involved in the day… almost take ownership of it, really. And all of those little details are made meaningful when you don’t just see cupcakes, but you see cupcakes-that-Amanda-iced and memories of flour-covered-kitchens. (sorry about the novel, Meg… I could go on and on here)
D. Have a deadline. Planning everything ourselves meant that we were building, creating, and setting up til Saturday evening. But I gave myself a cut off. After , no more wedding planning. Seriously. All that night, all the next day, no “planning” allowed. Whatever was left on the to-do list was dropped (some of it was “important”!), and I soaked my little feet and packed my suitcase for honeymoon.
I love this advice, from the engagement to the gift opening and everything in between I want my wedding to be about our amazing families and wonderful friends not just about me, or him because the guests that are at the wedding are the reason we are who we are today. I love the planning process with these important people involved and I need to remember to lean on them when I need it and to be ok with asking for help and giving up control when I need to. I also think that setting a deadline and being organized will be extremely important. Getting things done early so that I am not stressed around the wedding day will be a very important priority. I also think I get too caught up in my wedding being different and unique and I think Liz makes a good point that just because something has been done before doesn’t mean it is no longer a good idea. Hopefully I can keep this advice in mind as the months until the wedding get shorter and shorter.